My family is perfectly imperfect and not a day goes by without humour, tears or tantrums. Blogging is the modern version of keeping a diary so feel free to read along while I share the good the bad and the ugly aspects of being me!

Tuesday, 31 May 2011

Cause Cancer Isn't Enough

Our bodies are amazing things and they are capable of many miraculous things but eventually they become tired, especially when they were over run with rapidly dividing cancer cells and then are pumped full of poisons.

Chemotherapy isnt pleasant, it leaves Nick sick, tired, dehydrated and sore and some days I wonder if the treatment isnt worse then the disease. Today at clinic we were given Nick's blood counts and it shows that he will soon likely need a blood transfusion. If the hemoglobin level drops below 80 then they generally transfuse, Nick's came in at 79.
Nick also now has something called peripheral neuropathy which is often caused by one of the types of chemo medications that he takes. Peripheral Neuropathy is nerve damage to the nervous system which delivers messages from the brain to the spinal cord. What is happening at the moment is that the brain is sending messages to the central nervous system saying that the tips of Nick's fingers are numb and the bottoms of his feet are burning. He will be seeing an occupational therapist next week because at its worst PN can make gross and fine motor skills difficult.
Nothing about this is easy, one thinks that hearing the sentence "your child has cancer" is the worst part of the process but its not, there is all the other crap that goes along with it that makes it worse then initially imagined.
Nick has said that he feels as though the chemo is slowly killing him inside and that is hard as a mom to hear, especially when its said from the sore mouth of your weak looking child.
One day there will be a cure, One day another child wont be put through all of this and there wont be a need for all of the torture that cancer treatment is. One day a mom wont have to sit by the wayside and watch helplessly as their child loses everything that shaped their personality leaving them virtually an empty sickly shell of the child that they once were.
One day it wont be a common occurrence to be woken in the middle of the night by the sounds of your child getting sick or have to plan your day around when your child needs to take pills by the handful and painful shots.
One day the only bald heads that will be seen will sit atop the necks of old men and jewelry made of wooden bravery beads wont be more meaningful then diamonds.
All we can hope for is One day..........................

1 comment:

  1. Oh my, this entry really got the tears flowing. Here's hoping that one day comes soon.