Thirteen

Today my husband and I are celebrating our 13th wedding anniversary!
In a world of what seems to be disposable marriages we are proud of how far we have come.
Its not because there haven't been struggles - oh boy have there been struggles but its because we refocus and remember why we started. We remember that we wanted forever, that we wanted a different ending than both our parents had. Over the years there have been many stumbling blocks, we face challenges daily that statistics show frequently end marriages. We have had miscarriages, infertility, adoptions, a child with cancer, a child requiring multiple surgeries and needing daily accommodations, three children on the autism spectrum, we have each at times struggled with insecurities and bouts of depression and we have not always treated each other with as much respect as we should, we've said hurtful things and even done hurtful things, we are human and flawed but through all of this we have learned things too. We have learned that we are different individuals and we have different expectations and love languages. Its taken a long time to learn the secret codes of each other, to realize that we aren't mind readers and that we both must speak up to be heard. Its like a dance that requires a lifetime to perfect. If we'd walked away before we would have missed learning the moves that make the dance our own. We're a work in progress, we are two good forgivers, two people that strive for improvement, two people working towards the same goal, two people who have learned that appreciation goes a long way and two people who want to create a life together that makes our children want to follow in our footsteps. Most importantly we are two people who know that despite the old saying marriage is not 50/50 its 100/100 and both people have to give their all if its going to last a lifetime. Every year is a milestone and we are excited to see where the next year takes us.